Well friends, as of Monday I will no longer be a resident of Washington (at least for the foreseeable future). I am heading back to Texas to work with the Salesian sisters again in their Provincial House. I was initially going to help in the office for VIDES but the sister in charge is having back surgery and will be unable to work (or supervise others) in the office for a little while so I will begin my service elsewhere and then return to the VIDES office in a month.
It has been good being home, I have loved spending time with my wonderful family and enjoying the comforts of my old living space and the freedom to go where I want and do what I want. When I am with the sisters those freedoms are definitely reduced, as I submit my will to the good of the community and the tasks that the sisters have for me, and sometimes this is really hard for me, but I feel prepared now to go back and persevere. I have healed really well, my blood results came back good and though I can no longer eat gluten, the sisters will be able to accommodate that and I anticipate continuing in health. My time here has been filled with lots of learning about myself and my body, dentist trips, car maintenance, silly escapades, seeing old friends, dealing with insurance debacles, and trying to figure out some sort of long-term plan. I still don't have that last one down, I'll know a little bit more when I hear back from my graduate application, though getting accepted does present the problem of financing, so as usual, one open door brings us to another hallway with more choices and unknowns.
Please don't take this the wrong way my dear Washingtonians, but I really hope I don't move back, at least not for several years. You have no idea how much I am going to miss all of you, honestly the only way I'm dealing with it is not thinking about it, but I have to keep moving forward. Sometimes I feel I get stuck in repetitive behaviors because I haven't learned some lesson that I was supposed to or because I was a sap and just wanted to go back to something comfortable, but I want it to be different this time. It's all in God's hands, and I pray his will be done. I know I'm a hopeless idealist, so I guess I'm just telling myself that something will work out, I'll get a job I can believe in, I'll make a difference, and maybe I'll even be happy. I don't know what's going to happen, but when I does, I know I'll know.
In all peace and goodness,
I'll be seeing you.
It'll happen.
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